I was WAY too tired to go to the gym after school drop off today. I came home, ate some ice cream and popcorn for breakfast while binging more of The Bold Type and I thought about how I said I wanted to go at least 3 days a week.
I also thought about how much stuff I have to get done the next three days. Then I thought about all the sensory issues I’ve been having more than usual and how I hate all clothes. Clothes are, unfortunately, kind of an important part of leaving the house.
So I went through my dresser and tried on, no joke, SEVEN outfits before finding something comfortable enough to work out in. And even then, it really wasn’t. Nothing fit right. Everything was too tight or too loose or the wrong color or style or whatever.
So finally I was up to the point of leaving the house. But I couldn’t because there was a FedEx truck blocking my way. I called my sister to touch base about some stuff while I wait for the delivery guy to finish delivering to the neighbors. I finally got to leave and talked to her all the way to the gym and sat in the parking lot for way too long catching up with her.
I eventually forced myself to hang up only to find that I have no earbuds 😭 I left them charging next to the sofa. So I had to make the decision to drive home and give myself 17 reasons to just stay home or have no music.
Thankfully I’m getting better at making good choices. Even with the voice of anxiety screaming in my ears that I’ll never make it without the distraction of music, I got out of the car and walked into the gym.
I headed for the locker room where I was nearly run over by a couple of girls coming out and not watching where they are going. They made irritated sounds and one girl mumbled, “You’re welcome”. I have no idea why? It makes me wonder what other snide remarks I have missed while listening to my music.
I did my best to not overthink that and got myself settled in and headed for my go-to first machine when I have no plan – the lat pulldown. Got through that, moved onto the seated row, then the chest press. At that point my body was essentially screaming at me to stop, so I took a break.
As I was sitting there staring into space, I realized they moved the stairclimbers around so that more than one was free at a time. There were 2 free nearby and even though I do my best to avoid the torture machine and it had been like a year since I touched one, I decided since I was already uncomfortable and anxious, I might as well hop on!
Lat pulldown 3 sets of 5 @ 90 75 60 45
Seated row 3 sets of 5 @ 90 75 60 45
Chest press 30 @ 15lbs
Stairclimber 7 floors